Monday, September 28, 2009

I feel feisty, so it's story time...

Let's be honest, for me, being pregnant has not been fun. I don't foresee it being fun - is that bad? I am a little feisty this evening, so I thought I would take it out on my blog instead of accidentally lashing out at Michael (poor guy).

So, I've mentioned that I've had a migraine since Sunday, 9/20. It's in the base of my skull and my left temple. I also mentioned that I received a narcotic - hydrocodone, also known as vicodin - to help "crack" the migraine. My OB was super nice, and said, we'll get this taken care of (I heart him so much).

You also know that I called the doctor on Friday, and that I never heard back from them. I was more than a little pissed about it, but there wasn't really much I was able to do about it - what am I going to do, track my OB/nurse down at home? Anyway, Saturday was horrible, even with the meds they provided, so I called the nurse on duty.

First of all, she was rude. Dear miss thang, it's not my fault that your job requires you to be on call all weekend. It's the nature of your damn job, get used to it. Secondly, when I try to calmly (yes, calmly - I know that getting upset on the phone with someone isn't going to get you anywhere) explain my situation, don't sigh like I am the one putting a dent in your life. It's 11 a.m. - it's not like I woke you from your damn slumber. And, irritably saying, "Well, just go to the ER" doesn't help me either. So thank you, Miss-I-have-helped-zero-percent, you have officially made yourself look like a dumbass.

And, on a side note - one of the reason for rising health care costs is telling people "Well, just go to the ER" when they obviously just need some advice on how to get from one day until the next until they can talk to the damn doctor. What, have you never heard of an urgent/quick care? Thanks for playing.

So, I hang up with Miss Thang, and I am just...upset. I have had this pain for almost a week at this point, I feel like everyone at the OB office (besides my fantastic OB) finds pregnant women to be annoying (seriously?), and I would like to go back to the four days that I felt fantastic. Where did those days go? I've just got a lot of emotions goin' on, so I just promptly burst into tears, because I don't know what else to do. Then, my amazing dog Roxie, who was sleeping on the couch, comes up, puts her head under my chin, and just cuddles with me. It made me feel better, because I was by myself since Michael works weekends now.

I cried for a little while, then told myself to buck up because crying wasn't helping the damn situation. I called our insurance tele-nurse, and asked if I could get the same care at Urgent Care than I would at the ER. She said yes, but at this point it was 6 p.m., and I didn't want to deal with the damn Urgent Care, so I just ended up going to bed.

Sunday morning rolls around, and I wake up about 10 a.m. - apparently, I needed some sleep. and I decide to not take the pain meds to see if I was just working myself up in a tizzy for no reason (I have a complex that maybe I'm just making things worse, so I sometimes try to figure out how bad is it really, and can I really wait). I left the house at 11 a.m. to go to Urgent Care, and let's be honest, I really shouldn't have been driving. The sun was BRIGHT (one of the rare days I was praying for some cloud cover), and I had the patience of a June Bug (I don't know how much patience they really have, but it was the first thing that came to my mind), so the drive sucked.

I get in there, and I should have really stayed home. It was super busy and everyone had those flu masks on. Immediately I say to myself, is it bad enough to sit in here for however many hours it's going to take? The answer was a def. yes, because I was surprised how quickly my headache went from bad to worse.

I walk up to the front desk, and here is a heavier woman, mid-thirties, who obviously doesn't want to be there (Who can blame her? Everyone's wearing FLU MASKS). I obviously walk up to where the line starts, and she's still just chatting away with the female security guard that is reading a magazine behind the desk. Way to secure the place, lady.

Anywho, they keep talking, and I'm just standing there. I have to keep telling myself that this is not the time or place to pick a fight, and to keep my hormones in check. So she finally says, with disdain and a sigh, I might add, "Can I help you?" I walk up, and before I can finish saying "I need to see a doctor" I get a short "Well, I need an insurance card and picture ID." I get my stuff out, wanting to be a smart ass, but keeping it together.

I give her my stuff, and she asks what I'm there for. I say, short and sweet (because I know she doesn't give a crap what I'm there for, she just needs to know if for the triage nurse), "I'm 14 weeks pregnant. I've had a migraine since last Sunday. I'm on narcotics to crack the migraine. It's not going away. I need help." Pretty simple, right? The woman looks at me and says, with a little smirk on her face,

"Well, I don't know what else we can do for you"

?!?!?!?!?!!!!????!??????????????!?!?! !! $*#&@(*#&($&(&@(&!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear lady who hates her job, how long were you in med school? Where did you do your residency? Dunkin' Donuts? Last time I checked, you need to take my information down and pass it along to those who can actually help me. I don't need advice from Dumb Ass, MD in the front, THANKS.

Of course, that's what I thought, and no, I didn't actually say that - although I wish I did. I just said "Well, they told me to go to the ER, but I didn't want to waste my time there". Dunkin' Donuts behind the counter grunted and gave me my wrist band.

I sit down for about 20 minutes, and get called into triage by the nicest nurse, and she takes all my info. My blood pressure was a bit high (141/90), but she attributed that to the pain. On my way out, she gives me a flu mask. I ask how long it's going to take - she says, eehhhhhhh, about 2 1/2 hours.

I died a little on the inside.

I felt like crying, but said thank you and sat my happy butt back down and put on my mask. Then I felt like I was suffocating, so I took the damn thing off. But, really, what is a mask going to do? Come to find out they had lots of flu patients in the past week, so if I get the flu, we know where it came from.

By this point, I've had no meds, and I was not going to sit another 2 1/2 hours without them and practically in tears. I took some meds, and started to wait.

About 1 hour into waiting, a family who didn't speak english came in with this super cute little girl who was just screaming her head off. I felt so sorry for her, but I didn't want her to sit next to me - she was screaming SO LOUD. What happens? They sit next to me, screaming and all.

At this point, there is really no where else to sit, so I just start praying for strength because I feel like I could lay on the floor and die, and it would be ok. It was that bad. Finally, FINALLY they come get me.

I go to the room, and wait for 20 minutes. I am fine with this, because I am away from the screaming cute girl (I still heard her in the waiting room, and still felt super sorry for her). The nurse practitioner comes in, checks all my stuff for mobility, asks me questions, blah blah blah. I told her what my OB gave me to crack the migraine, and she rolled her eyes. I ignored it, because once again I wanted to go into the "You're not a doctor" shpeel, but whatever.

She said, well, we can give you this, this, or this (all take home meds). I thought, sweet, they are just going to send me home with some prescriptions and we can be done with this mess. But, then she said she had to look something up.

She comes back, and said, oh, we can't give you that stuff because you're pregnant. I had a resounding DUH in my head - why do you think the OB won't give it to me, pea brain? I said, oh, then what can you do?

They give a pregnant woman morphine through an IV, that's what they do! WHAT?! At that point, I didn't care, but they are awfully liberal with the narcotics when pregnant. I was like, whatever, so I waited for 25 minutes for a nurse to come do the IV - when I went to the restroom, the nurses were just standing around talking. Funny, my patience was through the roof on Sunday - that's pretty good for me.

Anyway, I had to call Michael from work to come pick me up, and I felt bad, but it's not like I could drive. After I called him, Big Mamma Nurse comes in with all of her needles and devices of torture. Again, I didn't care, just make it go away. Now, none of you know this, but I have what nurses call "Collapsing Veins". Once the needle goes in, they hide. They hide for stupid people, that's my philosophy.

So, Big Mamma Nurse tries my right arm, where the veins are bad, in my opinion. I tell her that, and she ignores me. I just close my eyes and wait for it. She sticks the needle in once, and digs. I mean totally digging for the damn vein. She comes back out, sticks it in again, and digs again. Can't get it. I tell her, again, that the right hand almost always works the first time. What does Big Mamma do? Goes to the damn left hand. Ok, whatever. She sticks - twice, and still digs. At this point, I'm in tears, and trying to talk through it. I usually pass out, but the head pains are apparently keeping me in the here and now.

So Big Mamma gives up and says, I have to go get another nurse. She patches me up, and leaves me for another 20 minutes. In the meantime, Michael gets there. Dunkin' Donuts from the front desk brings him back to the room - ugh.

Michael looks at me and says, Dear Lord! I have blood on my hand and arm, and I just know there is going to be all kinds of bruising at the site of Vein Assult '09.

Another nurse comes in, and we'll call her Crabby. She obviously hates her life - mid 40's in a gross flower patterned scrub uniform. At least she looks like she has done this more times than Big Mamma. She finds the veins on my right hand (finally), and sticks. And digs. I pull just slightly, and she yells "DON'T MOVE!!" I don't quite remember the next part, because I was in tears and she was yelling at me that my micro-movement almost stuck her BLAH BLAH BLAH. WHATEVER. It was an accident. If Big Mamma didn't dig so much, I wouldn't have flinched, thanks, Crabby! She then tries to make some small talk by asking me about morning sickness.

Don't get me started, lady. I told her that I had to be on medications and it was awful, so she goes into a story about how soda and crackers before opening her eyes in the morning helped. Dear Crabby, do you think I didn't try that, and everything else in the book? Thanks for FREAKING PLAYING!!!

I was just really irritated with Crabby, and immediately wanted Big Mamma Nurse back. Crabby then asked what I was there for, and I told her the abbreviated story. She looks at me and said, you know that you'll have migraines for 9 months, I don't know what we can do for you. Then goes into detail about how it was awful for her, but she got through it.

I almost threw her from the room. I was so mad. Whatever, she left after that, and I was polite and said thank you and sorry for almost poking her (which I don't think that I did), and she rolled her eyes and said "Yeah" and left the room.

The morphine kicked in, and I felt great. The pain level went to about a 2, which was awsome, they have me on fluids, the nurse practitioner comes back in, says awesome, and we're outta there. I felt weird afterword, but we went to the car, and I was STARVING - I'd been there for 5 hours, and the dumb pregnant lady didn't bring any snacks because she wasn't thinking. And she promptly threw up all of the fluids and meds they gave her at Urgent Care on the way home. It was amazing. I really hope it happens again.

Anyway, I get home, and slept, unfitfully (finally) for a couple of hours. You know what woke me up? The headache. It was back, full force. I was PISSED. So I just sit there, with a rag on my head, tried some claritin that the Nurse Practitioner suggested (which didn't work), and just watched Amazing Race, followed by a fitful night sleep. Yay.

This morning, I wake up, head raging, and I knew that I totally could NOT work in my office, with it's florecent lighting and noises up and down the hallway, so I worked half the day from home, in my nice, dimly lit home.

I called my OB AT 8 a.m., and requested to speak to the nurse. I go through the short version of the weekend's events, and mention that no one called me back Friday. The nurse was super nice, and said that it was her fault - she thought that the message was the old one from the previous Wednesday and threw it out. It was an accident, and accidents happen, so I was like, "It's ok". She said that she would talk to my OB today, and give me a call back.

Hi, it's 8 p.m. PST, and NO PHONE CALL. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, what do I have to do?!! I'm following protocol, processes, and procedures - could someone just call me back? Please?

So, I absolutely 100% have to be back at work tomorrow - I'm less than three weeks away from a major program that I am planning, and the fact that I've missed this much work already sucks. That's why I keep trying to work from home. That, and I'm going crazy.

So now of course I have Crabby Nurse in my head, saying "This will last alllll niiiinnneee moooonntthhss" and I want to smack her all over again. I really don't know what else the doctor is going to be able to do, but I at least need him to say "There is nothing else to do, suck it up". But I'm sure as hell not going to continue taking the narcotics - I've taken enough as it is. So, in the meantime, I'll just have to keep drinking all of my water, eating every 2 hours, and taking walks/exercising, and hope for the best.

Phew, the fiestiness seems to be leaving my body - lucky for Michael. :) And now Roxie is crawling all over me to get some sort of attention, so it must be time to go. And, here is her mark.... xsfffwwaffessasacscscscscsc.

Love her!

Friday, September 25, 2009

If it's not one thing, it's another.

It's been a few weeks since I've written - so sorry! It won't happen again. :)

First, a big shout out to Tracy Clark and her new daughter, Alexis Rose, born 9/19/09, and Savannah Baltera and her new daughter, Eleanora Grace, born 9/22/09. Yay for my friends and their babies - everyone is happy and healthy! (And a big thanks to both of them for dealing with my annoying butt, running into their offices with the words "Um, do you think this is normal...".)

The trip to Ohio for my cousin Holly's wedding was fantastic - it was SO worth the time and money. I was telling my mom just yesterday that before now I wouldn't ever really considered myself an overly "family-oriented" person - pregnancy certainly has changed that. We think of our family and friends often, and it scares me a lot to think that we're going to be on our own here, and can't call my mom to come help me in an emergency. Just another thing to get used to.

I have some GREAT news!! First, the pregnancy is going well, so YAY! Second, we find out the gender of the baby on November 2nd, which we are really excited about. Michael has already been scanning our first sonogram pictures for some guidance on what it may be. The 2nd picture that I posted last time may be showing a little wee wee (not the larger nubbin, which would probably be the umbilical cord, but the smaller nubbin a couple of cent. to the left). We could be full of it, but whatever, it's fun to speculate.

In other fantastic news, my morning sickness has faded and I no longer have to take anti-nausea medication. Yay!! There were about 4 days that I felt absolutely fantastic. Then, Sunday (9/20) happened. I woke up with a migraine, and it still hasn't gone away (it's Friday for those of you playing the home game). I went to my OB who prescribed me some narcotics to at least break the migraine, but it hasn't helped, so I called back today, and the nurse still hasn't called me back. If it's not one thing, it's another, I swear. Although I can't really move my head around without it throbbing and making me want to vomit, it's still better than the actual vomiting of morning sickness. That was like the 9th ring of hell. Still, the migraines (or is it still only one if it is the same one for 6 days?) are getting a little out of hand. I can't work with them, although I tried, so I better kick it this weekend because I can't take any more time off.

We've also picked out names for our little one!! They are....Naomi Marie and Noah Lee! We are super happy with the choices, and our "tradition" is passing our own middle names to our children. Yay!

I'm officially 14 weeks, so 4 months. Yay! It feels like I have been pregnant for about 100 years, so I'm already ready to get this party started. I still don't understand how pregnancy could be "the most amazing time" in my life, because it's not, let's be honest. Even if I have an amazing 2nd trimester, I still won't love it. Poor Michael, he's looked at me a number of times and says "We are not doing this again, because I can't stand to see you like this". Poor guy just doesn't know what to do. That's ok, hubby, I don't either, so we're in the same boat!! :)

This pregnancy definitely follows my personality - go big or go home. I would love to have a simple, wonderful pregnancy. Oh no, just like my personality and how my life goes, drama must ensue. I promise, I don't go looking for this crap - it just falls in my lap. I know some of you reading this may be smirking and nodding your head (I know you really well, mom! :) ) because you know it's so true. Just for the record, I would love for me to have an event free life, but alas, that doesn't look like it's going to happen. Not anytime soon, anyway.

So, now that there has been an update, let's move onto a topic that I've been seeing a lot on message boards and even news stories recently. Can a full-time career woman still be a full-time mom? I know that may seem like a weird question, but it comes from how some women choose to stay at home, while others choose to go back to work. It also encompasses how women perform in the workplace after they have children. I have read some articles about it, and thought I would share my opinion.

My filtered response:

While I respect the other opinion, I do think that a woman who works full time can be a good, full-time mother as well as a good, full-time employee. It disappoints me that there are still people in this day and age who stand by their claim that a woman's job is to stay home and raise the children. I respect women who have the opportunity, drive, and patience to stay home full time - I do not, however, feel like I would be able to do it and still stay true to what I want to accomplish out of life. I do not feel like this is taking away from my child, nor do I feel being a mother will take away from me being an effective career woman.

My unfiltered response (and what I would want to say, and what I may say to someone since the baby stole my filter):

What day and age are you living in? Just because I have a job, doesn't mean I am not being an effective mother, and just because I am a mother doesn't mean that I can't be effective at my job. I am already a full-time mom, and I haven't popped this kid out yet. I am already fiercely protective, and am trying to figure things out before he/she gets here. Yes, I will need to make arrangements to leave work early here, or pump breastmilk here, but let's be honest, I could still run circles around you. Mothers are the most amazing people on the planet - shuffling schedules, packing lunches, getting people to work/school on time, and still being able to make more and get more accomplished than your sorry ass. Just because I have a vagina does not automatically make me a candidate for staying home all day. I know myself well enough that I need additional mental stimulation in order for me to be at the top of my game, both at work and at home. So yes, I think I'm going to be an awesome mom and an awesome practitioner, and I have an amazing husband that will be knee deep in stuff too. Bite me.

Sorry, it just makes me SO MAD when people pull the "Well, you're a mom now, I bet you want to stay home, right?" or "You're never going to want to go back to work" or "You should stay home, because you would be half-assing both jobs". Oh, shut up. If that's what you expect of yourself, good, I'm glad, it'll work for you. I know that it won't work for me. Do I have the thought of "Oh, that would be nice", yeah, I do. But I know that I would be clawing at the door, needing additional stimulation, like my job, for my own sanity. My sister does an amazing job of being home all day, and having the opportunity to work more than part time for a university. That's an amazing deal that most of us don't have. But I still don't think I could do that.

Some may come back with, "Well, don't you want to know what your child is learning" and "You're not spending enough time with your child if you go to work". Yes, it's important to me to have my child stimulated and learning. That's why I don't drop him/her off at the neighbor's house and say peace out. I find a reputable day care, review their philosophy/curriculum, and Michael and I will make the decision. In my estimation, the people I am paying to watch my child def. have training with small children - ummmmm, I don't. That may seem like a lame-o excuse, but if I am going to take him/her somewhere, it's going to be somewhere they are knowledgeable.

I am confident that Michael and I are going to provide a loving, caring home for our child, despite me "going against nature" and working and satisfying my needs. A happy mommy is a happy baby. It's not like I work on a cruise ship and I am gone 3 weeks at a time. I'm gone from 8 -5, and we'll have a great time on weekends, too.

People absolutely kill me. You have no idea how many people are actually very vocal - and very rude - about women working while their children are small. It kills me.

::sigh:: Sorry, I saw an article the other day about this on a blog, and some of the comments were rude, and it got my blood boiling, so this was a good vent session. :) I think the topic I'll tackle next time is: Would you allow random people to come and hold the baby? Touch it's hand? Pinch the cheeks? Things to ponder.

That should be all for now, even though I could probably go on for another hour, but the computer screen is hurting my head. I'll leave you with a picture of me with my sister, who looks awesome after having 3 kids. Night!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

12 week ultrasound, NT test, and why I talk about pregnancy so much

Today, we had an NT scan, which is an ultrasound/blood test to review the possibility of Down Syndrome and Edwards Syndrome. Some women make the choice to not get this scan - I made the choice to b/c of some medications that I'm on, and I want to be sure things are progressing appropriately.

They are! We have a very small chance of either syndrome, so we have elected to not continue with the screenings/scans to identify further birth defects. Here is our bean at 12 weeks:

We are pretty sure we have a name for both a boy and a girl, but we aren't announcing them quite yet! :) However, we're reserving the right to change the name up until birth, LOL!

So, if you haven't noticed, I like to talk about my pregnancy. I like to talk about it a lot - it's new to us, I want to share with everyone! :) I love to learn about things, as well share our experiences with our friends and family. I know that not everyone understands this stance, and sometimes I get the "Oh my gosh, you are talking about it AGAIN" looks, or the "You're really talking about this so early?" looks. I am a pretty open person; Michael and I want to share our experiences as much as we can. I'm also pretty blunt, and pretty darn honest about stuff (if you didn't already know!! :) ). Anyway, if you are around me everyday, and you hear about the newest symptom or the continuation of old symptoms, that's why I talk about it all of the time - when I experience something, I talk about it a lot. It's who I am, and I'm cool with that.

Also, I think some of my hormones are leveling out, since most pregnancy comments don't bother me as much as they used to - even the "water" comments don't bother me as much! :) Instead of frustration, now it's more like, ::sigh::. Case in point - I keep being told how "young" we are to have kids. I'm 25! We got married when Michael was 22, and I was 23 - not 18 (like when I WANTED to get married, LOL). That makes me ::sigh:: because you're either too young...too old...too heavy...too skinny...too this, too that, blah blah blah. Pregnant or not, you're never going to win with everyone, so we should all stop trying! :)

I'm not trying to get all political and crap, but I will say how thankful we are to have healthcare. I couldn't imagine doing all of this without support from insurance; however, I hope we don't miss a hoop that we need to jump through, because if we do, it could be a costly mistake. So many people in this country don't have healthcare, and personally, if I were to not have insurance for some reason, I would want my child to have insurance. Some of you may know how hard it is to not have insurance available. I know how it sucks to be considered someone with a "pre-existing condition". That is why, after research on both sides, I have decided to support healthcare reform. If you aren't aware of the specifics, there is a lot of misinformation floating around - check out opinions on both sides, and make the decision for yourself. Ok, I'm done with political stuff. :)

That's probably it for now - I'm tired. This seems to be a pattern...maybe I'm pregnant! :)

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Quick HAHAA - post 2 of the day

I'm on right now (remember, I woke up at 2:30 am - see previous post), and saw this:

I went off on a lady in Panda Express that told me I shouldn't eat Chinese food because I was pregnant. I said (and quote), "Oh really?! What the fuck do women in China eat? French food?" And then I told her husband (or whatever) that if she couldn't control herself in public she shouldn't be in public. He didn't say shit to me.

HAHAHAAAAA - it's a board discussing how a woman went off on another woman for smoking during pregnancy, and now everyone is discussing their stories. What a good laugh - I wish I was that witty!

(For those of you offended by the language - my apologies - it just wouldn't have the same effect without it).

Happy Thursday!

Sleep eludes me, quick update, quick opinion, and implementation of a "WTF Moment"

First, I would like to say THANK YOU to all the amazing feedback I've gotten about this blog! Not only is it a great outlet for me to talk about pregnancy, but also a way to keep friends/family updated on life. It's hard being pregnant so far away from family (say, 2,000 miles), but technology makes it so much easier. My poor Mom was pregnant with my sister when my Dad was stationed in Germany - talk about far away from home. She wasn't even on the same continent as her family, and really only had letters to communicate with them. That sucks, man. Technology makes this much easier.

I woke up to the dreaded "I'm on a boat" feeling (no, not the song) at 2:30 am. It's now 4:15, and I can't get back to sleep. The nausea/vomiting are back full force, despite the medication to help ward it off. On Tuesday it knocked me on my butt, and I hadn't been able to eat for about 24 hours. I started to feel "funky" (that's about the only word I have for it), so we went to Urgent Care. Long story short, my blood pressure was 112/76 (lower than usual), and my heart rate was 123 bpm (high for blood pressure being that low). The doc comes in, says, "You're really dehydrated", gave me fluids, anti-nausea meds, and potassium, and I went on to dry heave the entire time I was there. It was such an awesome experience, I made great relationships with the nurses, and I look forward to my next visit.

In all seriousness, it sucked, but I am really thankful that I didn't have to go to the hospital for that. That would have really been a not-pleasant experience. Sleep seems to elude me more often than not, so I wouldn't doubt that I will begin to come into the living room during the early morning hours, have Roxie fall asleep on my lap, and continue to update le blog. And if this dizziness could go away, that would be great - I literally fell over last night, had to lay on the floor, Michael's face worried and Roxie licking my face. ::sigh::

Anyway, another observation that I've had about the "pregnancy world" is how hard women can be on other women.

(I love the commercials - they make me laugh. Sorry, I got distracted.)

I was talking to my Mom yesterday, and we were discussing how it's hard to make decisions on what to do for pregnancy/birth/raising kids (i.e. breastfeeding vs. formula feeding, doula vs. no doula, epidural vs. no epidural, how long you have your child rear facing in the car - seriously, I've never thought about this stuff - no wonder I can't sleep). We also discussed how pregnant women/mothers can be so harsh and judgemental of other mothers - thankfully, I haven't experienced it first hand, but I am sure I will.

Case in point: I am part of the community, which has been really nice to discuss some of these issues with other women. You would be shocked to see how many threads there are slamming decisions made by other posters. One woman discussed why she was formula feeding, and she got huge backlash from other mothers who say mothers who don't breastfeed are just "lazy". I was shocked! Who is some random person online to say another mother isn't making the right decision for her child? I, of course, gave my opinion stating that they were rude, and although I had some strong supporters, some women just wrote me off. I couldn't believe it!

I'll be discussing my own opinions on some of these topics, but I also hope to have links to arguments on both sides, that way my non-preggo friends can start being informed on the decisions. You may not care right now, but you may in the future - just throwin' it out there.

I really hope that I don't turn into a judgemental soccer mom, who is so overbearing that she completely makes all the decisions for her kids. It's sad, there are so many things that I want to avoid that I'm afraid that motherhood is just going to stress me out 24/7, and I'm going to forget to enjoy it.

That brings me to another point. I need to stop and smell the roses, although the smell makes me nauseous (that's my lame attempt at a joke at 4:30 a.m.). I try to keep a good attitude; sometimes it's hard, but I always say my prayers about how thankful I am for the opportunity to be a mother. It's the most amazing job on the planet, and it's moments like these, quiet moments with my dog resting on my leg (while I get the tingling-your-leg-is-way-asleep feeling), an info-mercial playing in the background, and the hum of the refrigerator that I realize how truly lucky I am. I have a wonderful husband, my best friend, who has been amazing through this whole process, a loving dog, a roof over our heads, a great job, a great family, and good friends, both in Vegas & across the country. I guess I'm just feeling really thankful this morning, and I can't wait to meet little baby bean to show him/her how amazing life can be, no matter what is happening in your life (good or bad).

I'm gonna be a mamma - that's wweeeeiiird (I still have my moments!!). :)

(Can I just share how PUMPED I am that Beatles Rock Band comes out in less than a week?! I can't wait to have my parents visit us for Christmas and have my Dad try out the drums - it's going to be good times that we have to get on tape, believe me!!)

On the appointment update, I have a triple screen next week (September 9), which means they take a whole lot of blood and do an ultra sound to see if little bean is susceptible to Downs Syndrome and other birth defects. Some women choose not to get this, but I did b/c I have to be on medication for a pre-existing condition, so I thought it would be a good idea. What I hope they do NOT do (which I'm still finding out if they are doing this or not) is an amniocentesis. For those of you playing the home game, that's when they stick a huge needle (about a foot long) into your abdomen to take a sample of the baby's amniotic fluid. Can we say a resounding "Hell no". If they do it, they're going to have to knock me out, Nope. I can't even wrap my head around that. What if the poke the baby's head? My baby would have a damn hole in it's HEAD. Could we not stress me out? Thanks so much.

So lots of prayers that they aren't doing an amniocentesis, or else I may just cancel the appointment and just hope for the best. Yes, I am that big of a baby.

I travel to Ohio September 11 - 13 for my cousin's wedding - thank goodness I am getting out of the city so I can see family, even if it is for only two days. Just pray I make it through the plane ride out there and back, lol.

And today's "I'm SO tired of hearing this" doesn't come from me, it comes from a good friend that is due pretty soon. She works with a lot of students, and many people pop in her office and say "You're never going to come back to work", and "You're going to want to just stay home with the baby!" Her responses to me were quite funny - I'm sure you can imagine, LOL. BTW, she really enjoys her job, and is actually quite ok with coming back to work. Just a little shout-out to her! :)

And, finally, I'm implementing something new: each blog is going to have a "WTF Moment". This edition: "Man slaps a stranger's screaming child" ( Really - we're serious?! I would rip that man apart - lord help the person who lays a hand on my child (see, I'm already getting all protective of my little bean!!).

Enjoy that article - it's enough to say "WTF".